In my clinical experience as a music therapist, I’ve seen how music and other sensory experiences help individuals improve their focus, impulse control, and emotional regulation. Try these fun (and whimsical!) activities, designed to stimulate the sensory pathways (sight, sound, touch, taste, and smell) to relax the body and mind.

The Scarf’s Serenade

Grab a light scarf. Put on some instrumental, relaxing music of your choice. Glide the scarf over your body. The calming and repetitive action works well to regulate hyperactivity, racing thoughts, and impulses, as your attention will be drawn to the sensory experience of the scarf over your skin to the tune of soothing music.

A Symphony of Mist

Put on a relaxing, instrumental music track. (Not sure what to select? Try “Raindrops Keep Falling on My Head” by B.J. Thomas. You’ll see why.) Grab a spray bottle and fill it with water. Spray it over your head and let the mist fall onto your face. The light touch of the mist paired with familiar, rhythmic music activates the parasympathetic nervous system, which is responsible for the body’s calming response. This helps shift the brain and body from a hyper-aroused to a more regulated and calm state.

The Balloon’s Dance

Put on some music and bounce a balloon to the beat. Music adds a predictable auditory rhythm, to which you can naturally sync your movements. Meanwhile, repetitive bouncing will provide a target for your focus and give your body an outlet for restless movement, without being overly stimulating.

Sticks and Sounds

Turn on your favorite music and grab two pencils or chopsticks. Then, tap along to the beat on any surface you can find! If you’re already in the habit of drumming along, keep at it. Tapping is a controlled, safe outlet for movement — you may not realize how it has probably helped you manage restlessness and reduce impulsive behaviors! Moving and grooving to a beat supports body regulation and coordination, promoting a sense of internal calm.

Music Therapy and ADHD: Next Steps

• Read: Music Therapy — Sound Medicine for ADHD
• Read: Rhythm Notion — 10 Benefits of Music for ADHD Brains
• Read: Music Is Magic — 9 Hacks to “Beat” ADHD Symptoms

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Many of us with ADHD, autism, and other forms of neurodivergence only started to “bring our whole selves” to work quite recently. As a result of neurodiversity training and DEI efforts, we began to unmask. We spoke more openly about executive dysfunction and sensory needs. We asked for accommodations, formally and informally.

But today, as DEI programs fade and inclusion efforts stall, many of us feel a familiar pressure returning. Overtly or covertly, we are no longer encouraged to be ourselves at work. Instead, we’re expected to mask and conform to neurotypical standards again. The pressure is back — to people-please, to be extra easy, extra agreeable, extra adaptable, and to act like everything is fine.

And it’s exhausting. We expend energy in ways most people never notice: suppressing our stims, rehearsing conversations, monitoring our behaviors. The extra cognitive load carries consequences: more burnout, more dysregulation, and far less access to our actual strengths.

What do we do when the progress we counted on begins to recede?

1. Avoid Personalizing It

Sometimes it’s easy to recognize what’s happening because the signs are obvious: The DEI team is cut. The language in the handbook changes. Sometimes it’s just a vibe shift — silence replacing celebration. The unspoken expectations to get things done and avoid standing out or speaking up. Either way, the signal is the same: Masking is back on the table.

Recognizing what’s actually happening – that these are structural changes and not a reflection on your abilities – will, I hope, help you avoid internalizing these changes as personal failures. As with all structural changes, the problem is not yours alone to fix.

[Read: “DEI – and Neurodivergence – Are Under Attack”]

2. Redefine Professionalism Before It Defines You

Too often, “professionalism” is code for “hide what makes you different.” But professionalism isn’t about being quiet or predictable. It’s about communication, accountability, and showing up with intention.

From scripts and stim toys to time-blocking apps and task batching, plenty of  tools and supports exist to help you do your job. Just remember: You don’t have to become someone else to meet expectations.

3. Find Safe Micro-Spaces

Even when company culture shifts, individuals inside it often don’t. Think of the co-worker who quietly advocates. The manager who gets it. The group chat where you can be blunt. These safe micro-zones can make a big difference. Tread carefully and look for the places where you can breathe. If you can’t find safe spaces at work, try participating in anonymous online support groups.

4. Don’t Trade Peace for Your Job

If your workplace culture no longer holds space for who you are, protect your energy accordingly. Set boundaries. Scale back. Exit as soon as you can. Do your best to remember that your job does not define you or anyone. You’re not being lazy, dramatic, or “too much” by keeping your peace. You’re responding to an environment that no longer feels safe — and your body knows it before your brain does.

[Q&A: “How Can I Stop People-Pleasing Behaviors at Work?”]

5. Look for the Helpers

In these trying and unprecedented times, it’s important to focus on the people who are doing the work to bring positive change. Whether it’s recognizing the manager or colleague at your job who continues to advocate for inclusive workplace practices or following like-minded, outspoken advocates on social media, make an effort to look for signs that not all is lost.

Perhaps the masking era never really ended. But the promise of inclusion gave many of us hope that we could work — and live — a little more authentically. If that promise is gone, it’s OK to grieve. But it’s also OK to hold your ground. You’ve already learned how to show up. You don’t need to shrink just because the culture did.

Lack of Inclusion in the Workplace: Next Steps

• Read: 4 Steps to Claiming the Career You Deserve
• Read: “Great Leaders Foster a Positive Work Environment for All Employees”
• Read: “Women with ADHD Prefer Silence Over Disclosure. This Needs to Change.”

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Yes, I could be seeing patients inside a clinical office to discuss suppressing or ignoring old behaviors while allowing a deeper self to arise. Or I could just remind them to bring an umbrella to our session today as we delve into these issues.

Three months into the COVID-19 pandemic, I moved across the country with my three young children to Palo Alto, California, for the University and College Mental Health Fellowship in psychiatry at Stanford University. But instead of joining a vibrant academic community, I worked from my apartment. Alone. A few months later, forest fires made the air quality so bad that we couldn’t even go outside.

[Free Download: How to Choose the Right ADHD Treatment Profesional]

As the pandemic began to lift, we wore masks when we treated patients in person. But in doing this emotional work, revisiting the difficult moments of a patient’s childhood, it is so important to see kindness on a psychiatrist’s face. So I made a decision: Whenever possible, I met with patients outside in nature, where masks weren’t required.

Benefits of Nature Therapy

After the pandemic ended, even as we sat in coats under umbrellas during the rainy season, I repeatedly asked my patients, “Do you want to do this in an office?” The answer was always the same: “Absolutely not.”

When patients are diving deeply into old pain, desperately hoping for connection while also fearing it, I can simply say: “What do you see, right now? What do you hear?” They look around at the grass and the trees, hear the birds, feel the sun on their skin, or hear the rain drumming on their umbrella. They discover that their fear is about the past, not the present. Try as they might, they can’t force their fear away any more than they can stop the rain. But they can notice it. They can choose to ignore the narrative it generates in their inner monologue. They can breathe and let the tears fall so that something new can grow.

The rainy season of change can be hard. But it doesn’t last forever. Eventually, spring comes. And the grass grows. To allow growth to change us for the better, we need to trust this deeply in our bodies. For my patients, I’ve found there is great power in learning from the change of the seasons. So we do the work. Outside. And sometimes it rains.

[Read: Go Take a Hike! (No, Really, It Helps.)]

Nature Therapy for ADHD: Next Steps

• Free Download: Everything You Need to Know About Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT)?
• Read: How Green Time Promotes Better Focus
• Read: Never Underestimate the Healing Power of Mother Nature

Aaron Winkler, M.D., is a board-certified psychiatrist in California. He founded and directed the Adult ADHD Clinic at Stanford University before deciding to pursue private practice.

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In research examining eating disorder symptoms among women aged 45 to 61, body dissatisfaction was cited as a key risk factor.¹ I have seen this firsthand. In 2024, more than 21% of calls to the National Alliance for Eating Disorders, a support and advocacy organization I founded in 2000, were from individuals (primarily women) age 40 and older.

Eating disorders are serious, brain-based mental illnesses with a strong genetic link.² They have the second-highest mortality rate among all psychiatric disorders.³ Yet many middle-aged and older women may not even recognize that they’re struggling with eating disorders due to misconceptions about these conditions and who they affect.

[Self-Test: Do I Have an Eating Disorder?]

An adult might have an eating disorder if they:

• experience extreme weight loss or dramatic weight fluctuations
• refuse to eat certain foods or skip meals
• exercise excessively
• show signs of purging

Calorie restriction, or bingeing and purging, can have a particularly adverse effect on an older body, possibly leading to poor health outcomes. When eating disorders go untreated, they can lead to bone loss, heart problems, and, in people who force themselves to vomit, lung conditions. And research shows that 11% of women with ADHD, compared to 1% of women without it, have a history of bulimia nervosa, a common eating disorder that involves gorging followed by vomiting or laxative use.
Other eating disorders common in older adults include:

• anorexia nervosa (extreme food restriction)
• binge eating (consuming large amounts of food beyond the point of feeling full)

Eating Disorder Triggers

For some women, the battle with eating disorders began in childhood. For others, body image struggles may be triggered by later-in-life events. These include:

• Perimenopause and menopause. The transition to menopause is now recognized as a high-risk time for eating disorders to develop or redevelop, in part because women are seeking ways to “control” their changing bodies amid significant estrogen shifts.⁴
• Aging and unrealistic ideals. The anxiety and stress of aging in a society that values youthfulness provides fertile ground for increased symptoms of disordered eating and dysfunctional attitudes, beliefs, and behaviors around food and physical appearance.
• Transitions. Divorce, an empty nest, widowhood, and other life events may lead to or reactivate disordered eating.

[Watch: “Eating Disorders Comorbid with ADHD — ARFID, Anorexia, and Others”]

“Too Old” for an Eating Disorder

Eating disorders are considered diseases of the young, and, consequently, they often go unrecognized in older women. Many clinicians believe their mature patients are “too old” to have such conditions.

If you suspect that you or a loved one may have an eating disorder, talk with a doctor trained in this area. The National Alliance for Eating Disorders offers guidance, resources, and referrals for treatment and care. It provides free, therapist-led virtual support groups for women at midlife and older to connect with others who are experiencing or recovering from eating disorders.

Do I Have an Eating Disorder: Next Steps

• Free Download: Types of Eating Disorders Associated with ADHD
• Read: We Demand Attention! A Call for Greater Research on Women with ADHD
• Read: ADHD and Eating Disorders: Research, Diagnosis & Treatment Guidelines
• Watch: “Eating with ADHD: Improving Your Relationship with Food”

Johanna Kandel is the founder and CEO of the National Alliance for Eating Disorders and the author of Life Beyond Your Eating Disorder: Reclaim Yourself, Regain Your Health, Recover for Good. (#CommissionsEarned)

SUPPORT ADDITUDE
Thank you for reading ADDitude. To support our mission of providing ADHD education and support, please consider subscribing. Your readership and support help make our content and outreach possible. Thank you.

Sources

¹Kilpela, L.S., Hooper, S.C., Straud, C.L., Marshall, V.B., Verzijl, C.L., Stewart, T.M., Loera, T.T., Becker, C.B. (2023) The longitudinal associations of body dissatisfaction with health and wellness behaviors in midlife and older women. Int J Environ Res Public Health. https://doi.org/10.3390/ijerph20247143

²Berrettini W. (2004). The genetics of eating disorders. Psychiatry (Edgmont), Nov;1(3):18–25. PMID: 21191522; PMCID: PMC3010958

³van Hoeken, D., & Hoek, H. W. (2020). Review of the burden of eating disorders: mortality, disability, costs, quality of life, and family burden. Current opinion in psychiatry. https://doi.org/10.1097/YCO.0000000000000641

⁴Khalil, J., Boutros, S., Kheir, N., Kassem, M., Salameh, P. et al. (2022). Eating disorders and their relationship with menopausal phases among a sample of middle-aged Lebanese women. BMC Women’s Health. https://doi.org/10.1186/s12905-022-01738-6

When Robert F. Kennedy, Jr. calls autism a “preventable disease” and floats the idea of an autism registry, he’s not only spouting fringe opinions. He’s echoing a long and harmful legacy of framing neurodivergent people — especially autistic people — as broken, burdensome, and in need of fixing.

As an autistic adult raising two autistic children, I know firsthand how this rhetoric shapes public perception, policy, and everyday life. I know how much damage it can do.

In casting autism as a public health crisis and something that “destroys families,” RFK, Jr. is stripping autistic people of their humanity. Our identities become problems to be solved, not lives to be understood or supported. The implication is that people like me and my children should not exist — or at the very least, should be feared, tracked, or corrected.

[Read: “Rising ADHD and Autism Rates Reflect Education — Not a Crisis”]

These comments from the secretary of Health and Human Services aren’t new. They echo decades of pathologizing narratives, including from some mainstream autism organizations that have historically centered some parents’ despair at raising neurodivergent children while ignoring autistic perspectives. But when the nation’s health secretary proposes a government registry of autistic people, it takes that fear-based framing out of the shadows and puts it on a national stage. It taps into old eugenic ideas and weaponizes public health rhetoric against a marginalized group.

Research shows just how dangerous this framing is. Autistic people already face higher rates of discrimination, mental health challenges, and suicidality — especially when we lack acceptance and community.¹ Portraying autism as a tragedy increases stigma, which in turn predicts worse well-being and reduced access to needed supports.² It also correlates with more negative parenting experiences: studies show that when caregivers view autism through a deficit lens, they report higher stress and lower family quality of life.³ In contrast, when autism is understood as a neurotype rather than a disease, outcomes improve — not just for autistic individuals, but for their families as well.

In raising two young children — both delightful, both autistic — my days are filled with sensory swings and deep chats and meltdown management and belly laughs. It’s not always easy, but parenting never is. The hard parts don’t necessarily come from my kids’ neurotypes. They often stem from systems and expectations that were never built for people like us.

When public figures portray autism as a tragedy, they reinforce those broken systems. Insurance becomes harder to access for affirming therapies. Schools and workplaces feel justified in denying accommodations. Families are instructed to control and conform instead of adapt. And autistic people — especially those who are also queer, BIPOC, or multiply disabled — internalize the message that their very being is a mistake.

[Read: ADHD, Autism, and Neurodivergence Are Coming Into Focus]

But there is another story we can tell, one rooted in dignity, interdependence, and acceptance. It’s the story I live every day as I advocate for my kids and unlearn the shame I once felt about my own mind. It’s the story of thousands of autistic adults who are fighting not just for services, but for belonging. It’s the story the neurodiversity movement has been telling for years, and it deserves a louder megaphone than RFK, Jr.’s.

We don’t need a registry, and we don’t need a “cure.” We need a revolution in how we understand autism — not as something to be feared, but as a natural part of human diversity. Our job isn’t to eliminate autism. It’s to eliminate barriers and provide support so that all autistic people can live joyful, self-directed lives.

Autism and Neurodiversity: Next Steps

• Free eBook: The Truth About Autism in Adults
• Read: MAHA Commission Means Fear, Stigma, Health Threats for Two-Thirds of ADDitude Readers
• Read: “ADHD Is an Actual Condition. You Can’t Beat It Out of a Child.”

SUPPORT ADDITUDE
Thank you for reading ADDitude. To support our mission of providing ADHD education and support, please consider subscribing. Your readership and support help make our content and outreach possible. Thank you.

Sources

¹ Cassidy, S., Bradley, L., Shaw, R., & Baron-Cohen, S. (2018). Risk markers for suicidality in autistic adults. Molecular Autism, 9(1), 42. https://doi.org/10.1186/s13229-018-0226-4

² Botha, M., & Frost, D. M. (2020). Extending the minority stress model to understand mental health problems experienced by autistic people. Society and Mental Health, 10(1), 20–34. https://doi.org/10.1177/2156869318804297

³ Botha, M., & Frost, D. M. (2020). Extending the minority stress model to understand mental health problems experienced by autistic people. Society and Mental Health, 10(1), 20–34. https://doi.org/10.1177/2156869318804297

Grown-ups write a weekly meal schedule on a Sunday and do careful calculations before drilling holes. They make sandwiches the night before and remember to take them to work.

Grown-ups quell their transient urges in the pursuit of long-term goals. They commit, they save, they resist, and they toil. They get where they were planning to go.

Tedium does not torment the regular grown-up. If a boring job needs doing, they simply get on and do it. They are not hijacked by the urgent need to be anywhere else but the present.

Grown-ups don’t pull their phone-charger cable out while chatting and distractedly plug it into their mouth. They hardly ever go to bed with their keys left hanging on the outside of the door, and I very much doubt that they have 14,000 unread emails. Grown-ups absolutely do not tell someone they’ve just met that their underwear is stuck up their bum.

So, nope. Not much grown-uppery going on around here.

Even motherhood has failed to rebirth me as a convincing adult, if I’m honest. I love with abandon, but I do not have the skill set of an executive PA, despite what my children’s school might assume.

I’m the parent with the kid in full uniform on wear-whatever-you-want day and no cash for the cash-only book fair. I’m the mum at the bounce party who demos an illegal maneuver and then watches as a 6-year-old copies and knocks out his tooth.

[Read: Diaries of “Adulting” (or Not) with ADHD]

I Don’t Feel Like an Adult: The Fallout from Falling Short

Like lots of people acutely aware of their flaws, I’ve learned to jump in and laugh at myself before others can take a shot. But I still feel small when I fail to measure up to societal norms, no matter how many jokes I churn out at my own expense.

I am also reduced to jelly by the ice-cold dead eye of those proudly logical humans repulsed by malfunctions of common sense. I see their disdain as a sign of deep self-loathing, but I nonetheless crumble at their condemnation of me and the faults I may well never fix.

My lack of adulting acumen has cost me. Failure to plan, persist, and apply what I learn from experience has thwarted my ambition and harmed my self-trust. It limits my capacity to meet my potential and avoid repeating mistakes. It hurts.

Why Can’t I “Adult?” It Was ADHD All Along

I cannot describe how I felt when I read about the symptoms of inattentive-type ADHD in women. I ticked almost all of the boxes and made sense to myself for the first time ever. A single condition explained what I had always viewed with quiet shame as manifestations of immaturity, weak character and sloth.

I waited 30 months for an assessment and then sobbed the whole way through it. When my diagnosis came, it felt like a big “welcome home” by people who finally got me. You are not alone! Come on in! Sorry about the mess. It was truly the biggest relief of my life.

[Take This Self-Test: ADHD Symptoms in Women]

Now I’m busy learning how my traits and behaviors conspire to keep me feeling like a child.

Of course I have trouble resisting temptation. My brain yearns for dopamine to bolster its fragile supply. And I leave things to the last minute not out of preference or bravado but because concentration evades me until a deadline is so close I can smell it.

There’s a reason too why I struggle to stay on-task when a job is neither urgent nor appealing. My filter for blocking out irrelevant stimuli has the authority of wilted spinach. Distracting noises and thoughts roll in freely while I’m trying to focus and the effort it takes to ignore them leaves me feeling drained and frustrated.

I am not devoid of reason (though I never really thought I was). My prefrontal cortex is clear-thinking and analytical. But when my lizard brain floods with emotion, the rational part of me doesn’t carry sufficient clout to talk it out of a spiral.

It’s empowering to have language and insights about ADHD to help me understand and convey to others what I’ve always known but lacked the words or concepts to explain.

Learning How to Be an Adult

My ADHD diagnosis hasn’t magicked me into a grown-up. But it has made me feel happier and more in control of my choices. I’ve grieved for lost dreams and stopped beating myself up all day long. Decades of self-castigation, it turns out, yield little positive change.

And ADHD is not all bad, let’s be honest. My neurodivergent strengths and leanings make life a lot more fun. They predispose me to creativity, which brings me joy and flow. It can feel like the meaning of life itself when ideas spill forth with apparently mystical ease. I’m entertained by my daydreaming too, which helps me spot links and patterns that don’t always jump out at others. I’m flexible and adaptable and I come alive under pressure. I’m pretty sure ADHD makes me more tolerant as well. Being aware of my own annoying quirks makes it natural for me to cut others some slack over theirs.

I’m not sure I’d swap any one of these traits for an immaculate car or the ability to tell you what I’m having for dinner next Tuesday.

Will I ever feel like a grown-up? Never completely, I hope. I’m pleased my diagnosis has helped me find ways to manage. But I plan to grow more than just upwards. I intend to grow outwards, inwards, and in any direction that my passion and curiosity take me. That is the most authentic, and surely therefore the most grown-up thing I can do.

“I Don’t Feel Like an Adult:” Next Steps

• Sign Up: Essential Support for Women with ADHD
• Read: The Adult in the Room — I’m Not It!
• Read: 42 Raw Confessions from Women with ADHD
• Read: “I Learned I Couldn’t Trust Myself, Then I Found I Had Undiagnosed ADHD.”

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Daily life is interesting, to say the least, with two conditions that try to pull me in different directions.

I don’t really lose car keys or paperwork. Still, my home office is a mess.

I can focus for hours on my favorite topics and watch video after video on YouTube. But I seriously lose focus when I have to read lines and lines of text, especially if the information does not engage me.

I have quicker access to my emotions than most men, I suppose, which I’ve been bullied and teased over since childhood.

I wait until the last possible moment to get something done. (Though procrastination is something I’m getting better at addressing.) And I used to struggle a lot more with anxiety, especially over changing plans, and experience frequent meltdowns that left me feeling angry and ashamed.

Sensory sensitivities? I have a few. Noise-cancelling headphones are my source of comfort. I cover my ears when an ambulance blares by. Wood floors prevail over carpeted ones. You’ll seldom catch me barefoot.

Growing Up AuDHD and Not Knowing It

Much of my life did not make sense to me prior to my diagnoses. I was the quirky kid who struggled to fit in and who didn’t think and act like his peers. I lived in my head most of the time, coming up with all kinds of stories and doodles. In many ways, being neurodivergent, even if I didn’t know it, kept me out of trouble.

When I was placed in special education classes in elementary school, the only explanation I was given was that I was “slow.” Though teachers and psychologists told my mother that I had ADHD, she did not accept the diagnosis for fear of stigma. What would become of a Black boy with the ADHD label who also took meds? So, the diagnosis was kept from me — as were accommodations that could have helped me.

[Read: Why ADHD Is Different for People of Color]

My life began to slowly fall apart in adulthood. I felt like an impulsive, uninterested kid inside the body of a fully grown man. Finally, I sought answers for myself.

Being AuDHD Has Opened Up My World

Learning I was autistic and had inattentive ADHD gave me so many answers and set me on a path to better coping. On me most of the time are my trusted noise-cancelling headphones and a sketchbook with my favorite pens and pencils. My phone and laptop help me stay organized and keep up with day-to-day tasks. I am careful about carving out time to journal and sketch, which curbs my anxiety. I also have a support system that includes my wife, friends, family, and my church family. And I’m learning to rest and take time for myself when I need to, without guilt or shame, and well before reaching burnout.

Like many people who learn of their neurodivergence later in life, I was relieved, but I also mourned. I realized how hard I had been on my younger self — the autistic Black kid with ADHD who had no clue why he was so different. I didn’t think or behave in ways that fit cultural stereotypes. I masked a lot, and most of my interactions with people were scripted, a skill learned from years of studying the communication styles of TV news anchors.

At the same time, being ADHD and autistic has opened my world. I think differently and help others do the same. I often find answers and solutions that haven’t occurred to others. I feel deeply, which makes me compassionate and sensitive to the needs of people. The knowledge I’ve picked up from my special interests and hobbies makes me a reliable source, or at the very least someone who makes good conversation.

If ADHD and autism separately are still widely misunderstood, auDHD is on a different level. I share my diagnosis regularly with people looking for evidence of what I have, not realizing that auDHD doesn’t have a look or race, and that there isn’t a singular auDHD experience.

My advice for late-diagnosed auDHD adults, especially for Black men, would be to be patient as you begin to uncover your layers. It is natural to dwell on the many years you pushed through feeling different. But it is also an opportunity to advocate for others who grew up just like you. Your diagnosis will serve as an open door, inviting others to explore their mental health needs and challenge their thoughts about neurodivergence.

Could You Be AuDHD? Next Steps

• Take our self-tests:
  • Adult ADHD
  • Adult autism
  • ADHD in women
  • Autism in women
• Learn: How to get evaluated for autism as an adult
• Free Download: Bring this checklist to your autism evaluation
• Learn: Autism and ADHD in adults
• Understand: The auDHD experience

SUPPORT ADDITUDE
Thank you for reading ADDitude. To support our mission of providing ADHD education and support, please consider subscribing. Your readership and support help make our content and outreach possible. Thank you.

In reality, there is no crisis.

The rise in diagnoses reflects a long-overdue recognition of neurodivergence — particularly among girls, women, and people of color who were historically overlooked — rather than a sudden explosion in neurodivergent individuals.

Neurodivergence Overlooked: A Well-Documented Pattern

My own neurodivergence was overlooked for many years. As a child, the only label my brain was ever given was “gifted.” At the same time, I struggled with sensory overload, social exhaustion, and the inability to complete simple tasks despite excelling in areas that schools valued. Yet, like many high-achieving girls, my difficulties were attributed to personality quirks rather than neurological differences.

It wasn’t until adulthood, while seeking evaluations for my own children, that I saw myself in the screening questions and research, leading to my own diagnoses of ADHD and autism. Like many women, I only began to understand my brain after fighting for my children to be understood.

[Take This Free Screening Test: Autism in Women]

What Explains Rising Rates of ADHD and Autism?

At first glance, rising autism and ADHD diagnoses may seem like evidence of a true increase. But research points to three other drivers: changes in diagnostic criteria, greater awareness, and increased access to evaluations.

Decades ago, autism was largely understood in terms of its most visible and disabling presentations, meaning that countless individuals — especially women, people of color, and those with high-masking traits — were overlooked. Research shows, for instance, that autistic females often camouflage their autistic traits, leading to delayed or missed diagnoses.

Similarly, ADHD was historically viewed as a disorder affecting only young boys. We understand today that women with ADHD often exhibit internalized symptoms, such as inattentiveness and emotional dysregulation, which deviate from the hyperactive, disruptive stereotypes commonly associated with the condition.

Increasing awareness of neurodiversity in general has made many people more likely to recognize signs of autism and ADHD that may have gone unnoticed in previous generations. The availability of evaluations has expanded as well, making it somewhat easier to obtain a diagnosis. And since a formal diagnosis is often required to access educational accommodations or workplace protections, many individuals have a stronger incentive to pursue assessment than in the past.

It’s also possible that neurodivergence itself has increased slightly over time due to environmental or societal influences. Some researchers have investigated whether prenatal exposures — such as pollution, maternal stress, or certain medications — could play a role, though no consensus has emerged. Others speculate that modern life, with its increasing reliance on digital stimulation, structured schooling, and high cognitive demands, may be making traits associated with autism and ADHD more noticeable or challenging.

[Watch: An Open Conversation with Temple Grandin – Autism Expert, Author, and Scientist”]

However, there is no clear evidence that these conditions are becoming more biologically prevalent, only that we are finally recognizing and understanding them on a broader scale. It’s not that more people have suddenly become neurodivergent, but that more of those who were always neurodivergent are now being identified.

Celebration, Not Alarm

Some worry that broadened diagnostic criteria has blurred important distinctions, grouping together individuals with vastly different experiences and needs. They argue this could make it harder for neurodivergent people to secure the right support, especially if those with lower support needs are seen as “using up” resources meant for those with greater needs.

But from what I’ve seen, the opposite seems to be happening. The increase in diagnoses is driving greater awareness and acceptance of varied neurodivergent experiences and that, in turn, is fueling a more unified and politically powerful advocacy movement.

The fact that more people are receiving diagnoses should be cause for celebration, not alarm. It means that more of us are gaining access to self-understanding, accommodations, and community. Autistic adults who receive a formal diagnosis report higher self-esteem and overall psychological well-being, attributing their improved mental health to better self-understanding and acceptance. Many autistic adults describe their newfound understanding of their neurodivergent mind as transformative, giving them a greater sense of identity.

The rise in diagnoses is a sign that we are finally beginning to recognize and support the diversity of human minds. Rhetoric to the contrary reflects a fundamental misunderstanding of what is happening in the neurodiversity space, and threatens to roll back progress, reinforce stigma, and making it harder for people to seek the support they need.

The answer isn’t to reduce diagnoses by retreating to outdated ideas about neurological differences. The answer is to build a neurodiversity-affirming world — one where fewer people need a diagnosis just to be seen, heard, and supported.

ADHD and Autism: Next Steps

• Take our self-tests:
  • Adult ADHD
  • Adult autism
  • ADHD in women
  • Autism in women
• Learn: How to get evaluated for autism as an adult
• Free Download: Bring this checklist to your autism evaluation
• Learn: Autism and ADHD in adults
• Understand: The auDHD experience

Charlotte Hill, Ph.D., is a policy analyst and neurodiversity educator in Oakland, California. 

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Nevertheless, a mixture of anger, grief, and relief washed over me when I was officially diagnosed. ADHD and autism, or auDHD, were my “new” realities (new only in label, of course). Though I was prepared for the evaluation, I never thought to research the emotional aftermath — an oversight I deeply regret.

Chances are that your autism and ADHD diagnoses will come with their own aftershocks. From someone who has lived it, here’s a bit of what you might experience, so you can prepare.

1. Mourning the Childhood You Never Had

The moment I walked out of my assessment, my brain flooded with unpleasant childhood memories. Many of these highlighted moments in which auDHD had been on full, plain-as-day display. My neurodivergence absolutely should have been picked up by the teachers and mental health professionals around me.

The desk that I couldn’t keep organized. The room that I couldn’t keep clean. My inability to focus on anything beyond my passions and interests. The executive dysfunction that plagued me. My zero tolerance for boredom. My lack of eye contact. My tendency to self-isolate. And the stims. Oh, the stims.

[Take This Self-Test: Autism in Girls]

But that’s just the tip of the iceberg. I was misdiagnosed, hospitalized, over-medicated, and left without improvement or answers. Every aspect of my life had been a baffling uphill battle.

Post-diagnosis, I was thrust into a period of mourning for the little girl who should have had a much easier childhood. I cried for the preteen who couldn’t keep up. I desperately wanted to time travel and reassure the younger versions of myself that everything would be OK, that help was coming.

Your diagnosis, like mine, will be validating. It may also set off intense grief for what could have been. No amount of obsessive scientific research could have given me the tools to grapple with that.

2. You’ll Unmask — Willingly or Otherwise

Don’t be surprised if your auDHD symptoms appear to intensify immediately after your diagnosis. I struggled to focus, and my socializing abilities (which were already abysmal) plummeted. My friends and family began to comment on my fidgeting. A couple of rude people even asked questions like, “How come you weren’t like this before your diagnoses?”

While their inquiries were decidedly insensitive, I actually asked the same questions in my own head. Why was I suddenly struggling more? It was mystifying, until I realized that my symptoms and struggles had not changed, but my relationship to them had shifted. More specifically, I was more accepting of them.

[ADHD, Anxiety, and Autism: Your AAA Guidebook]

My diagnoses, while emotionally draining, also illuminated all the shame I had buried deep within. The dual diagnoses felt like a permission slip — an unspoken authorization to ditch the neurotypical façade. The mask I had donned all these years was probably why I was able to fly under the radar for so long, but it never really camouflaged my otherness.

My diagnoses gave me the courage to gently remove the mask altogether, examine it, thank it for its service, and bid it farewell. It was terrifying, like saying goodbye to a lifelong toxic friend. But it also felt like an important step in the radical acceptance of myself as an autistic woman with ADHD. And that meant that more people were able to observe my fidgeting, hyperactivity, executive dysfunction, stimming, disorganization, and a host of other symptoms to an extreme they hadn’t seen before.

It was, and still is, nerve-racking. But it felt, and still feels, deeply necessary.

3. You’ll Develop a New Interest: AuDHD Awareness and Advocacy

One of the pleasant surprises of my post-diagnosis existence was the opportunity to hyperfixate on a good cause. I now co-exist with the insatiable urge to learn, speak, and write more about neurodivergence. I revel in building connections with others (especially women) who are autistic and/or have ADHD, and I hope to raise awareness about the realities and nuances of these conditions.

With all its challenges, my post-diagnosis life is brimming with a new sense of purpose. I have an identity outside of auDHD, but this part of me is loud and large. It’s integral to who I am, who I was, and who I will become.

In a world full of misinformation and stigma surrounding neurodivergence, I feel uniquely positioned to speak up. It is incumbent upon me – while still figuring out life with auDHD — to share my joy, my struggle, and my truth. I hope my perspective can help other women with auDHD expand their own awareness and become inspired to advocate, too.

Could You Be AuDHD? Next Steps

• Take our self-tests:
  • Adult ADHD
  • Adult autism
  • ADHD in women
  • Autism in women
• Learn: How to get evaluated for autism as an adult
• Free Download: Bring this checklist to your autism evaluation
• Learn: Autism and ADHD in adults
• Understand: The auDHD experience

SUPPORT ADDITUDE
Thank you for reading ADDitude. To support our mission of providing ADHD education and support, please consider subscribing. Your readership and support help make our content and outreach possible. Thank you.

March 4, 2025

As the Trump administration moves to dismantle Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion policies in the public and private sectors of the United States, my thoughts turn to one of our country’s largest minority groups: people with disabilities.

According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, more than 1 in 4 Americans — or 70 million individuals — live with a disability. This diverse group spans all age groups, racial and ethnic backgrounds, gender identities, sexual orientations, socioeconomic statuses, and religious beliefs. Disability doesn’t discriminate.

DEI programs and initiatives designed to encourage diversity and promote fairness in education and in the workforce benefit people with disabilities, including those with ADHD. And with the dismantling of these programs, we are witnessing a surge in discrimination toward people with disabilities. The full impact of the Trump administration’s dismantling of DEI policies on people with disabilities is difficult to measure but impossible to discount.

Disability In Dire Straits

I have served as a disability advocate for the past 25 years; 15 of those years were in higher education as a professor, program coordinator, and director of disability services. I have a graduate degree in rehabilitation sciences and am a nationally certified rehabilitation counselor. This is not a field I chose; rather, it chose me.

You see, I am also a mom to three children with disabilities and a fierce advocate for many more. In recent years, I have seen a gradual erosion of the services and protections available to individuals living with disabilities. I have been hesitant to voice my concerns over these changes because, by nature, I am a people pleaser. I stay in my lane, keep my head down, and get my work done. But that all changed two years ago.

[Free Resource: Classroom Accommodations for Children with ADHD]

In April 2023, as an assistant professor and rehabilitation counselor, I was offered the opportunity to train more than 500 rehabilitation counselors on multicultural competencies in counseling, among other things, under Florida’s Vocational Rehabilitation program. Cultural competencies help us, as counselors, support our clients by taking into account their backgrounds and acknowledging our own internal biases. I was excited about this collaboration — until Gov. Ron DeSantis announced that the training was no longer permitted under the state’s new DEI policies.

Soon after, DeSantis signed a bill into law banning the state’s public universities from spending funds on DEI initiatives. This included training counselors on their ethical obligations as professionals. I explained that people with disabilities are from all demographic backgrounds and that counselors who understand cultural differences can more effectively support their clients’ vocational and mental health needs. I even offered to do the workshops for free. I was shut down.

Colleges and universities live under the threat of having funding withheld if they do not comply with political mandates to eliminate courses, programs, student organizations, support services, and other initiatives with DEI components.

[Read: “Here’s What Happened When I Revealed My ADHD on LinkedIn”]

The Escalating Attack on DEI

Florida’s assault on DEI initiatives two years ago foreshadowed what is happening today in American politics, and the threats to public and private institutions alike is real. I fear that President Trump is setting a national agenda and tone that does not value people with disabilities and their vital contributions to society. The evidence of this is everywhere:

1. The standard Accessibility Statement on the White House website was removed by the Trump administration. This lack of visibility and accessibility underscores a lack of concern for Americans with disabilities, who had visible accessibility statements under Presidents Biden and Obama.
2. The U.S. government has eliminated DEI efforts in all federal agencies and is pressuring private companies to do the same.
3. The Trump administration aims to dismantle the U.S. Department of Education (DOE).
• The DOE oversees federal funding for K-12 schools servicing students with disabilities and handles discrimination complaints in education, including non-compliance, under the Americans with Disabilities Act (ADA). Roughly 7.5 million students, or 15 percent of the student population, receive special education under the Individuals with Disabilities Education Act (IDEA), which provides $15 billion to support students with disabilities. Without the federal DOE, funding for students with disabilities would be eliminated, as well the ability to enforce allocation of services to these students.
• The DOE provides protection. Seventeen states are actively working to eliminate 504 Plans in their education systems. The absence of strong federal oversight would leave millions of students vulnerable to discrimination and lacking the resources needed to be successful in school.
• The DOE provides funding to Title 1 Schools. Federal dollars target schools in low-income areas to “provide all children significant opportunity to receive a fair, equitable, and high-quality education, and to close educational achievement gaps by allocating federal funds for education programs and services,” according to the National Center for Education Statistics.
• The DOE oversees federal student aid to college students. Students could lose untold dollars in loans, grants, and federal student aid if the DOE is eliminated.

Disability rights are human rights. Disability rights are civil rights. Disability rights matter.

We must not turn a blind eye to the strategic maneuvers at play in our national politics. America’s leaders are making calculated decisions that threaten to upend the lives of thousands of Americans with disabilities. We must speak out.

What can we do today?

1. Take a stand. Educate yourself and those around you. Advocate for disability rights.
2. Call or write to your local, state, and federal legislators, your local news organizations, and to President Trump and Vice President Vance. Write op-eds explaining these harmful policies.
3. Organize grassroots efforts in your community to support people with disabilities.
4. Check in on people who are affected by these changes. Let them know they are not alone.
5. Boycott businesses that do not value diversity, equity, and inclusion.
6. Practice self-care. Go for a walk. Have dinner with a friend. Dance. Laugh. This is a marathon, not a sprint. We all need to take care of ourselves.

What Does DEI Mean: Next Steps

• Free Download: 40 Winning Accommodations for Your Child with ADHD or LD
• Read: “DEI – and Neurodivergence – Are Under Attack”
• Read: “Justice for All: What We Lose When the Country Abandons DEI”

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Thank you for reading ADDitude. To support our mission of providing ADHD education and support, please consider subscribing. Your readership and support help make our content and outreach possible. Thank you.

No matter how early an ADHD diagnosis comes, isolation is a core part of the neurodivergent experience. It starts early. The school system, designed for neurotypical children, can be rigid and unforgiving. I know it was for me. School fed a negative feedback loop, making me and other children with ADHD believe we were deficient.

Home, a supposed sanctuary, is not always a safe haven either. Denial or minimization of symptoms are common coping mechanisms for our parents who struggle to acknowledge that we are different.

[Read: “All My Friends Are Neurodivergent — and Wonderful”]

Growing up with undiagnosed ADHD meant that adults in my life perennially punished and shamed me for behaviors that I couldn’t help. They genuinely believed I was lazy and wanted to fail. Even today, in my 40s and with an ADHD diagnosis, my family has made it clear that they do not accept the diagnosis and, therefore, do not accept me for who I am.

Why Chosen Families Matter

Families comprise people thrown together by chance and genetics. Chosen families are built on shared experiences, similar life circumstances, and intentional decisions. When our families of origin fail us, our chosen families often fill the gaps.

A group of robust, supportive, reliable, nonjudgmental, and empathetic friends and loved ones make all the difference for those of us on the fringes. They mitigate the chronic frustrations of living with ADHD. They are the antidote to ostracization.

Who is in my chosen family? Other parents with ADHD whom I met through my son’s school, for one. We share our tricks for managing symptoms, but the most important thing we do is “see” one another and offer encouragement through struggles that neurotypical people do not understand.

[Read: “I Found My Neurodivergent Safe Space, Where ‘Socially Awkward’ Is the Norm.”]

Even my doctor is part of my chosen family. I knew this after he told me what no other health care provider in my life has: “You are in control.”

It took some time for my chosen family to come together. What helped me in the early days of my diagnosis was poring through the volumes of online forums, groups, and websites dedicated to ADHD. Though nothing beats in-person bonding, reading about others’ experiences with the condition online made me feel like I wasn’t alone for the first time in my life.

A chosen family helped me regain the self-esteem that was stolen away by living with undiagnosed ADHD for so many years. My ADHD community provides me with unconditional love, support, encouragement, and a safe space to make mistakes without eternal punishment and labels. If our blood bonds cannot provide the former, then we must find others who can so that we may, in turn, be someone’s shoulder to lean on. Our mental health and well-being are too important to leave our community bonds in the hands of an arbitrary family tree.

Chosen Families and Neurodivergence: Next Steps

• Read: “The Gift of a Friend Who Requires No Explanations, No Excuses”
• Read: “I’m Resilient, Strong, and Proud. Thank You, ADHD.”
• Find Your Chosen Family: Join Our Facebook Group & Follow Us on IG

Maria Reppas lives with her family on the East Coast. Her writing has been in The Washington Post, USA Today, Newsweek, New York Daily News, Ms. Magazine, and Business Insider. Visit her at mariareppas.com.

SUPPORT ADDITUDE
Thank you for reading ADDitude. To support our mission of providing ADHD education and support, please consider subscribing. Your readership and support help make our content and outreach possible. Thank you.

February 13, 2025

When I conduct diversity, equity, and inclusion (DEI) training in my roles as a clinical psychologist and consultant, I start with a simple question: What matters to you?

Family, respect, hard work, loyalty, spirituality, God, traditions, independence, and identity are the most common responses. These are the same responses I heard from active military service members during my tenure as an Army clinical psychologist.

Most of us share these values. Shared values are the cornerstone of all relationships. When values align, so do our actions in the name of our shared principles and beliefs.

Our Shared Values: Holding Up a Mirror to the Nation

Values shape entire nations. The United States was formed under the belief that life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness are inalienable rights. Unfortunately, our nation created a conundrum when it limited the populations to which these values applied. These values did not apply to the millions of enslaved Africans who were forcefully brought here across the Atlantic over more than 400 years. Even after slavery was abolished, these values still did not apply.

Millions of Native Americans were also denied these values as their land was imperialistically taken and decimated by settlements, colonies, and war, then eventually forced onto reservations. Asians, Pacific Islanders, Latinos/Hispanics, and others — groups that are deeply connected to American soil — have similar testimonies of systemic oppression.

Structural inequities, as we know, don’t just exist along racial and ethnic lines. People of marginalized identities, including individuals with different abilities and disabilities, have long been cut off from the values that our country purportedly upholds.

[Read: Racial Disparities in ADHD Care — How Clinicians Can Better Serve Patients]

DEI Is About Accountability

America’s legacy of structural, systemic inequity and disparity is why DEI programs exist.

DEI and equal opportunity (EO) initiatives are meant to counteract historical wrongs, the impacts of which are still felt today. They are pivotal in holding America accountable to its stated ideals and to its people, which is why — in the face of executive directives to end DEI — dismantling supremacist systems designed to perpetuate inequity must remain a priority so long as these systems impair some individuals’ life, liberty, and pursuit of happiness.

Dismantling begins with awareness of our country’s historical injustices. When we understand how the past has shaped the present, we see how to shape this nation’s trajectory to avoid repeating those errors. We can choose to learn from our mistakes and take steps to ensure all people are valued, regardless of skin tone, ethnicity, or ability.

To end DEI and similar initiatives — to no longer commit to righting wrongs and upholding our values — is to condemn the U.S. to a path of devolution and regression. Going backward would unearth chaos, deteriorate our nation’s connective tissue, and enact a social, economic, and humanistic toll that will be felt by everyone.

DEI in the Military: Valuing All Who Serve

What do we value as a nation? Can we say that we value the contributions of all – including those who protect this country – when we’re dismantling initiatives designed to ensure that all qualified people have the opportunity to contribute?

[Read: I Have ADHD. Is the Military Right for Me?]

On multiple occasions – as a soldier, officer, and even as a behavioral health provider – I have encountered prejudice and racism, well beyond daily microaggressions, that caused me much pain and harm. I leaned on diversity and equity programming for support during those times. At a minimum, my career survived.

My patients of color often pursue therapy to learn how to cope with instances of unfair treatment, lost opportunities, and persecution for minor infractions. Many BIPOC members of the military endorse turning to EO and DEI programming for support after experiencing discrimination. These services provide real help.

And what of the thousands of active service members of different abilities? What of changing perceptions that have recently allowed qualified neurodivergent applicants and those with other medical conditions the opportunity to enlist? Will we rollback these efforts, too, and prevent perfectly eligible individuals from serving?

I shudder to think that history will repeat itself with military members of marginalized groups – those who have served and fought in every major campaign from the Revolution to the present – finding their sacrifices unvalued and unworthy of equitable treatment, opportunity, and respect.

DEI and Neurodivergence: Next Steps

• Read: “DEI – and Neurodivergence – Are Under Attack”
• Read: How to Gauge Diversity, Equity & Inclusion — Key Questions to Ask in an Interview
• Read: “I’m a U.S. Army Aviator — and I Have ADHD and Anxiety.”

The views expressed in this article are those of the Author(s) and Do Not Reflect the official policy or position of The Department of The Army, Department of Defense, DHA, the US Government, or Henry Jackson Foundation for Advanced Military Medicine, Inc.

References

Of note, according to Erich Wagner writer for the Government Executive, “14,003 EEO complaints across the government in fiscal year 2020. 7,506 alleged discrimination on the basis of reprisal or retaliation, followed by 4,221 allegations of age discrimination, and 4,214 allegations of discrimination on the basis of a physical disability. In fourth place were complaints alleging race discrimination at 3,972, and 3,643 complaints alleged sex discrimination.”  Article and Data sources provided below.

The Federal Government Paid Out Nearly $70 Million From Discrimination Cases in 2020 – Government Executive

EEOC Issues Federal Workforce Report for 2020 | U.S. Equal Employment Opportunity Commission

Federal Sector Reports | U.S. Equal Employment Opportunity Commission

Department of Defense Board on Diversity and Inclusion Report

February 6, 2025

The invisible string connecting so many neurodivergent entrepreneurs today is this: Many of us never intended to become entrepreneurs; we just didn’t find the average workplace to be hospitable to the way our brains work.

Before I became self-employed in 2010, I always felt like a square peg in a round hole. I changed companies and career paths regularly in search of the elusive place where I could thrive. Based on the stories I hear from other neurodivergent adults, I know this is the norm.

Even though it’s been glamorized for those of us who are neurodivergent, the entrepreneurial lifestyle is not right for all of us. Many of us would love to find a workplace where we could be ourselves — without the stress of masking or worrying about whether we truly belong or are just being tolerated. We ache for a place where we could allow our unique contributions and talents to shine.

While awareness of neurodiversity in the workplace has expanded in recent years, the future appears grim as diversity, equity, and inclusion (DEI) programs have come under attack. Workplaces, it appears, will become increasingly inhospitable to neurodivergent talent over the coming years.

DEI – and Neurodivergence – Under Attack

A day after taking office, President Donald Trump signed an executive order to systematically dismantle DEI programs across the public and private sectors, claiming that these programs are “dangerous” and “discriminatory.” Prior to the order, major companies, from Meta to Target, had already started rolling back DEI initiatives.

[Read: How ADHD Inclusivity Drives a Key Competitive Advantage]

Neurodiversity is an often-forgotten aspect of DEI programs, and the obliteration of these initiatives will spell disastrous consequences for Americans with ADHD, autism, and other forms of neurodivergence. While legal protections for neurodivergent employees exist under the Americans with Disabilities Act (ADA), DEI programs are still critical. They display a company’s commitment to attracting and retaining neurodivergent talent and to creating the kind of supportive environment that enables employees to actually access their workplace rights.

Why DEI Matters

Fueling anti-DEI efforts is the false narrative that neurodivergent individuals are under-qualified or incompetent. The opposite is true. Neurodivergent employees contribute valuable perspectives, often excelling in areas like pattern recognition, innovative problem-solving, emotional intelligence, and creative thinking. It’s also often the case that this potential is only unlocked in inclusive environments where neurodivergent employees feel secure enough to speak up about what they need to thrive. Without robust DEI practices, many neurodivergent employees will surely face an impossible choice between struggling in silence or risking stigma (or worse) through disclosure.

DEI initiatives transform abstract legal rights into practical workplace realities. The rollback of DEI policies threatens this delicate ecosystem. While the ADA provides a legal framework for accommodations like flexible schedules and a quiet workplace, DEI practices create the cultural foundation that makes requesting these adjustments feasible (or, even better, simply built into company operations, without the need for disclosure). Companies that recognize natural variations in how people think, learn, and process information are at an advantage.

DEI initiatives in the workplace, with a focus on neurodiversity, can lead to enhanced productivity and greater innovation. Sixty-three percent of employers who are taking some action to create a more neuroinclusive organization say they’ve seen a positive impact on employee wellbeing. Sixty percent also say they’ve seen a positive impact on employees’ level of comfort in talking about neurodiversity.

[Read: “Great Leaders Foster a Positive Work Environment for All Employees”]

Organizations must recognize that DEI initiatives, contrary to what critics say, are about putting qualified people on an even footing, regardless of any aspect of identity. DEI programs are about creating conditions where all employees can fully utilize their talents. As neurodiversity awareness expands — and as more people learn about their own neurodivergence — companies will need to catch up to remain competitive.

Despite attacks on DEI, companies can maintain inclusive practices by training managers in neurodiversity awareness, normalizing accommodation requests, and fostering a culture where different working styles are valued rather than merely tolerated.

We are standing at a crossroads with respect to human rights. We can either retreat to a world where legal protections exist in isolation, or we can maintain the DEI practices that make these protections meaningful. For neurodivergent professionals, this isn’t about politics — it’s about the fundamental right to bring their full capabilities to work. The future of business excellence depends on our willingness to bridge the gap between legal rights and lived realities.

DEI and Neurodiversity in the Workplace: Next Steps

• Read: How to Gauge Diversity, Equity & Inclusion — Key Questions to Ask in an Interview
• Read: 5 Hallmarks of a Neurodivergent-Inclusive Workplace
• Read: ADHD Is a Protected Disability… But I Still Face Discrimination

SUPPORT ADDITUDE
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Treating ADHD (and other existing conditions) is key to reducing stress and improving wellbeing. But the work doesn’t stop there. Below are other fundamental ways to reduce your stress and its effect on your life.

How to Manage Stress: Control Your Thoughts and Mental Energy

1. Understand your triggers. Think about a typical day. When does your stress spike? Which situations cause you to feel irritable, anxious, or overwhelmed? Make a list of the parts of your day that cause the most friction.

2. Reframe the situation. Keep the following questions visible — like in sticky notes on your desk or notes on your phone — for quick reference.

• What is in my control? Focusing on this will minimize wasted energy and help you move through stressful situations with less frustration.
• What is the worst that could happen? How likely is that scenario?
• How have I handled similar situations in the past?
• Will the reason for my stress matter in a week? A month? A year?

What is stressful now won’t likely last forever. But if it will matter, then develop a plan to respond to the stressful situation. No matter the case, don’t hide from your worries. Avoidance is tempting, but it often backfires and leads to ruminating.

[Get This Free Download: Emotional Regulation & Anger Management Scripts]

3. Routines are invaluable during times of stress, as they provide structure and help you conserve your mental energy. As best as possible, stick to your daily routine, even if stress threatens to throw you off.

4. The last thing on your mind when you’re stressed is laughter – and that is reason enough to call in your sense of humor. Connecting with the humor or irony of a situation has a funny way of breaking the tension and putting you in a better place to problem-solve.

5. Be kind to yourself. Stressed about feeling stressed? Guilt and shame won’t serve you, so give yourself the kindness and understanding that you would give to a friend as you battle your stressors.

How to Manage Stress: Care for Your Body

6. Aim for daily movement. Consistent physical activity is powerful for warding off stress and its effects. Even a quick burst of activity, like a stretch or walking break, can help you manage stressful moments.

[Read: 33 Ways to Prioritize Your Mental Health]

7. Help your body fall and stay asleep. It’s a Catch-22: Sleep is crucial for managing stress, yet stress can interfere with sleep. Your mission during stressful times is to support your body in falling and staying asleep. You can do that by maintaining the same sleep-wake times, keeping your bedroom quiet, and following a soothing bedtime routine, no matter what that looks like for you.

8. Eat mindfully. Does stress ramp up or dampen your appetite? No matter the case, commit to making balanced choices across the food groups. Limit highly processed foods and drink plenty of water each day. When you nourish your body, it will handle stress better.

9. Go outside. Even short periods of time in nature can reduce stress and improve well-being.² In the time you’re outside, put your phone away and remain present. Notice the sounds and sights of world around you.

10. Listen to music. An intense song can be your outlet for intense feelings. A relaxing melody can soothe you, while an upbeat song can energize you and bring you to a better state of mind. Consider creating playlists for different moods, all in the name of stress reduction.

11. Breathe deeply. Deep breathing activates the parasympathetic nervous system, which helps the body relax. Get into the habit of deep breathing a few times a day. (Set a reminder on your phone!) Inhale for five counts, hold for two, and exhale for five.

How to Manage Stress: Lean on Others

12. Tap into your community. Whether through a hobby, your workplace, or online groups, bonding with other people — especially like-minded, neurodivergent individuals — has a way of reducing stress, even if you don’t end up talking about what’s on your mind. Not sure how to rekindle an old friendship? Get back in touch with these tips.

13. Manage social media time. Social media can help you connect with people and find support. At the same time, social media can increase stress due to content overload, doom scrolling, comparison, and other factors. Recognize how you feel when you’re on social media and plan to limit your time.

 14. Give back. Stress often causes us to get lost in our heads. So long as you have the bandwidth, take a break from your worries and put in the time to help someone else, which can help you gain perspective.

How to Manage Stress: Next Steps

• Free Download: 9 Truths About ADHD and Intense Emotions
• Read: Keep Calm and Breathe Om – 7 ADHD Relaxation Techniques
• Read: When Panic Attacks — How to Fend Off ADHD Stress

SUPPORT ADDITUDE
Thank you for reading ADDitude. To support our mission of providing ADHD education and support, please consider subscribing. Your readership and support help make our content and outreach possible. Thank you.

Sources

¹ Corominas-Roso, M., Palomar, G., Ferrer, R., Real, A., Nogueira, M., Corrales, M., Casas, M., & Ramos-Quiroga, J. A. (2015). Cortisol Response to Stress in Adults with Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder. The international journal of neuropsychopharmacology, 18(9), pyv027. https://doi.org/10.1093/ijnp/pyv027

² Jimenez, M. P., DeVille, N. V., Elliott, E. G., Schiff, J. E., Wilt, G. E., Hart, J. E., & James, P. (2021). Associations between Nature Exposure and Health: A Review of the Evidence. International journal of environmental research and public health, 18(9), 4790. https://doi.org/10.3390/ijerph18094790

Ways in Which I Attempt — and Fail — to Mask

I buy an extra-large calendar for work and use a rainbow of colors to never forget my to-dos, attempting to visually imprint the needed information in my mind. I set timers. And alarms. And reminders on my Alexas.

I hang up a 48-inch by 47-inch magnetized chalkboard on the wall near my kitchen, so I’m able to see it from three rooms away. This way, all appointments and reminders are front and center, smacking me in my face.

I coated the board with chalkboard paint, but the wait in between each coat made me fear I’d lose interest in my attempted organization before I was able to finish.

When all was said and done, the board didn’t erase as I hoped. It turned out I accidentally painted the board’s porous side, not the slick side. So the board is now anchored to the wall with the month of July crossed out, August written in its place. A reminder of another grand idea that met a swift demise.

[Read: 5 ADHD Organization Tools That Never Work for Me – and 5 That Do]

I buy a trending keychain that comes with 24 tags hanging off of it. Their purpose? To annoy and remind me to get my tasks done so I can remove said tags from my wrist. I need reminders to take my medicine, to remember my computer, to charge my phone, to pack my lunch and coffee, and all of the other things I tend to forget.

But wait, there’s more. The back of my hand serves as the backup to my backup. Reminders smeared on my skin for appointments I’m sure to miss.

I Mask, and Pay the Price for It

The memory on my laptop keeps running out. A clean sweep is warranted, but I only end up deleting a few downloads at a time because I’m afraid of deleting a document, file, or picture I may someday need.

I have 30,700 unopened emails, 549 unheard voicemails, and 125 tabs open on my phone browser. It’s no surprise that I missed last month’s email telling me my story placed 11th in Round One of a contest I entered. Or that I completely missed Round Two.

[Read: “Masking with ADHD Is the Ultimate Energy Drain”]

A few months ago, I entered another writing contest, made the honorable mentions category, and received an exciting monetary award. I kept waiting for the check to come in the mail, telling myself, “next week.”

But next week never came, and instead I missed the email, and subsequently the window, to collect the funds.

And so, I hide.

I buy the new journal, or planner, or whatever I feel I need, to appear and attempt to be a little more organized.

So, How Do We Break the Masking Cycle?

We accept and educate ourselves. It is only through a deep dive into how our minds work that we better understand why we think and do the things we do.

We speak up and out. We tell our truth, remove our masks, and allow our voices to be heard, normalizing the conversation surrounding ADHD and other mental health disorders.

And finally, we have a sense of humor.

Neurodivergent Masking: Next Steps

• Free Download: The Funny Side of Living with ADHD
  
• Read: Why ADHD Masking Is a Form of Self-Sabotage
• Read: “We Are Who We Are. There’s No Shame in That.”

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